When the anger dissipates, all that's left to do is to examine the aftermath and try to pick up the pieces. And when I actually stop to look at the damage, I realize that the stronger you feel for someone and the closer you get, the harder the fallout ends up being. We burned so brightly together, and we flamed out just as quick when the breeze came.
I don't want to finger point or argue anymore. What's the point? We both yelled, texted and blogged all that we had to say and more. We guilt tripped, we took personal shots and we ended up showing off the worst of us. I guess I just find it tragic that we would spend so much time and effort into letting someone in, and then we'd go and sabotage our own happiness because we're afraid of the very thing we want. And it's disappointing to know that what was once so right and true now leave us as strangers that can't even care about one another without hurting each other.
Deep down, we want to try so hard to find the right words and do the right things for us but without realizing it, all we do now is try to cause as much pain and bitterness to each other as we feel ourselves. And that kind of fallout is just sad. Maybe it was necessary for us to move on, maybe it's a part of life, and maybe one day we might even look back and accept the people we were and the decisions we made, but it's still sad. No time in the world will change that.
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