It's been a whirlwind last few weeks filled with mistakes and mixed emotions, and so while my friends are either at Syracuse, the Fairhaven Retreat, or family events, I got a chance to revisit the place I always end up drawn to during difficult times.
This place is my sanctuary, and I almost forgot what it felt like to put up shots on a beautiful day, accompanied by the steady sound of dribbling or the occasional stroke of the mesh. It was just me, my demons, and an 18-inch rim. I felt alone, exposed and vulnerable, but I felt real. And for the first time in a long time, I felt like I recognized the man who was taking jumpshot after jumpshot, and who he wanted himself to become.
I've always looked at others and played traffic light with their lives so much that somewhere along the line, my own started coming off the rails without me realizing it. But you know, it's kind of funny how having an orange ball in my hands can be so cathartic, and what I couldn't come to terms with lying awake in my bed, I could on cracked pavement and between bright yellow lines. We always say we aren't satisfied with standing still while the rest of the world is moving, so maybe it's about time I filled my life and my empty words with the very thing I'm afraid of -- change.
..and I wonder if God knows that outside of church, this is probably the place I listen for Him the most.
--
Side note: I believed in you when nobody else did, and I would've gone up to bat for you, but really? You're on your own on this one.
This place is my sanctuary, and I almost forgot what it felt like to put up shots on a beautiful day, accompanied by the steady sound of dribbling or the occasional stroke of the mesh. It was just me, my demons, and an 18-inch rim. I felt alone, exposed and vulnerable, but I felt real. And for the first time in a long time, I felt like I recognized the man who was taking jumpshot after jumpshot, and who he wanted himself to become.I've always looked at others and played traffic light with their lives so much that somewhere along the line, my own started coming off the rails without me realizing it. But you know, it's kind of funny how having an orange ball in my hands can be so cathartic, and what I couldn't come to terms with lying awake in my bed, I could on cracked pavement and between bright yellow lines. We always say we aren't satisfied with standing still while the rest of the world is moving, so maybe it's about time I filled my life and my empty words with the very thing I'm afraid of -- change.
..and I wonder if God knows that outside of church, this is probably the place I listen for Him the most.
--
Side note: I believed in you when nobody else did, and I would've gone up to bat for you, but really? You're on your own on this one.
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